Those That Have Gone Before.

 I    t is difficult living with the prognosis of terminal cancer. It is difficult knowing that someday I will  cease to exist. and all that I ever was will be gone. To add to this difficult time is watching others succumb to cancer also. 

    I am reminded of the passing of a high school friend of mine. It was way back in the days of MySpace. I had just discovered his, Thad's, profile when where I learned of his passing from cancer.. It was difficult to process that tragic news. Here was this man who was my age, and his life was over. Part of the grieving process is to question our own mortality when someone dies. This is particularly difficult when someone of your same age dies. 

    It becomes almost oppressive when people you know are dying of cancer. My aunt and uncle hlived across the road from their best friends. Betty was the first person I knew who had cancer. I remember her beating cancer, but having the misfortune of going into recurrence I remember the tin of hand-rolled marihuana cigarettes that helped ease her pain. When she passed, it was hard on everyone who knew her.  To add to that tragedy, her husband, Gene also became diagnosed with cancer. In fact Gene was seeing a nutritionist for his cncer when I was ging through my first bout with cancer. People recommended that I see his nutritionist, but Gene's condition worsened and he passed before I could inquire about his nutritionist.    

    When I was in the Navy, a friend of the fatally was diagnosed with cancer in her foot. The prognosis was stage 5 terminal cancer. Alta died shortly after the discovery of her cancer. She was a mother of five. That tragedy weighed heavily on all of us for quite a long time. Her tragedy was only surpassed by the death of a friend of mine who was 5 years my junior. Jordan Brown was diagnosed with a recurrence  of cancer and died 18 days later. It still tears me up inside to think of her death. She left behind a young daughter. 

    It is so very difficult to remember all of these people that cancer has taken away from us.  We are coming up on Memorial Day. We are to remember those who sacrificed their liveds for this country. We also use the day to remember all of those who have gone before us. I will never forget those who died for our country now will I forget those who have died of cancer before us. 

    Life is not only fragile but it is prescious too. Live healthy. Live long. 

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